Flashy Pants, Flashy Pooch

They make diapers for dogs. I know this because, this past weekend, I bought them. It was probably one of the most embarrassing purchases I've made in the past year or so. Even more embarrassing than when I bought "Fun Betty" which is a cleverly packaged box of hair dye for your "down there hair". It wasn't that much fun - in case you're wondering. I bought hot pink and the entire process took an hour. The end result? My Betty looked a little bloody. Not as sexy as I had imagined, but I digress.

Dog diapers. Being the over protective mom of my fur kid that I am, I have a crazy mad fear of getting her fixed. I'm a nurse. I know the risks of major abdominal surgery on people. Let them take the knife to my poor, unsuspecting baby??? Never. So, once every 6 months, she gets a visit from her aunt flow.

I was out in Long Island, being a house guest of The Boy's all weekend and I did not want to have tiny drops of blood on his carpet, so I did what any other normal dog owner would do in my situation. I bought a pair of "Flashy Pants" ("for the bitch in season" read the insightful description on the box - and I ask: aren't we all?). Let's not forget the accompanying box of sanitary pads that fit inside the "washable undergarment". What the hell is it under?? The dog has fur! If anything, it's a over-garment.

This purchase was more embarrassing than the time I had to buy my own box of tampons for the first time. I was actually standing on line - in a PET store - with a box that clearly said "sanitary pads" on the front and sides. I felt like one of those sick people who paint their dog's toenails and parade them around in baby buggies.

The poor dog was so embarrassed in her Flashy Pants. She walked around with her butt to the floor the whole time. There's a ruffle on the end. Her tail peeks through. It was just a barrel of ridiculous. Not to mention the fact that she was accidentally let out in the backyard with her Flashy Pants still on. She had her first accident.

My dog wet her pants!!!

She could barely bring herself to play with the other dogs, so embarrassed was she.

Seriously, it must be love. True, unconditional, pet love. Because there I was, on the floor, the dog on her back, changing her diaper, assuring her that the accident was not her fault. She looked so confused. So fearful that her mommy had probably lost her mind.

I do have to say, though, those Flashy Pants do work. The carpet was spared. For the mere price of $15. And my dog's dignity.

My exciting week

I still have 2 more nights of work, off Sunday and back for 3 in a row.  I love nights because I can get things done during the day and because I am so not a morning person.  But sometimes I miss the curling up on the couch with a glass of wine and some trashy tv midweek feeling.

It's been a week.

Last night at work a man peed in his applesauce container.  When I asked him why he said "It was there and it was empty".  He wasn't homeless.  I bet at his house he uses the toilet.  It's a very interesting thing the ER does to people.  They come there and they have the urge to be naked, to yell and to urinate in areas most places would deem illegal.  Or at least inappropriate.

Speaking of peeing, I'm dogsitting for The Boy's family's sheepdog.  Who hates to pee on concrete.  She will only pee on grass and only while she is off the leash.  So to walk the two pooches has been quite the interesting task this week.  My dog pulls and she's 60 pounds.  His dog is good but she's 80 pounds.  I have to trek to the only nearby area that has grass (which is limited in Manhattan) and let the big one off the leash while I beg my dog to behave and stop being jealous.  I also have to coax the sheep dog with "Izzie go pee" 6 or 7 times before she understands what is expected of her.  Then we make the trek home (because the nearby grass isn't really that nearby) and I have to beg Izzie to eat.  

I wanted 2 dogs for a while and now I'm rethinking the whole thing.  It is sweet how she follows me all over the place though.

There isn't too much going on.  The Boy is out of the state, the job is tiring, but entertaining and the dogs make it possible for me to skip the gym this week.